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Ruth had pocketed the letter after reading it at home the night before. She'd penned a letter to the gazzette and secreted it there, and now she was approaching her childhood home with a lump in her throat. She could make out the sound of her son laughing while Pearl took care of him; she would not intterrupt that play time and nor was she coming to pick him up since Pearl was quite smitten with Jacob.
She quietly walked in through the front door and greeted her sister in law with a soft nod, then asked gruffly, "Ma?"
Seeing the expression on Ruth's face, she pointed toward the kitchen and said, "Yes, she is home working on supper now. Are you quite alright, Ruth?" She gave a soft nod, and then a strained smile. Knowing that expression all to well, Pearl stood and brought the boy over to give his mother love for a moment.
Once she was done, she moved to the kitchen in search of Lottie, wanting to catch her before her father got home because he was going to be angry at Angus as soon as he got the story. She needed to be able to speak to her mother about it first and get it off of her chest.
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"Oh 'allo dear," Lottie responded, recognising the voice of her offspring. Yet, she instantly knew something was wrong - call it a mother's intuition, or just hard learned experience - but her daughter's tone was off. There wasn't the light, bouncing melody of general conversation And that was before Lottie even could read more obvious expressions.
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06-15-2024, 01:06 PM
(This post was last modified: 06-15-2024, 01:09 PM by Ruth Blacke.)
"Ma..." She murmured before sitting down. "I'm free, Ma... Angus..." She kinda gave a hiccup sounding sob, smoothing the nervously crumpled letter. She then read the letter out loud to her word for sordid word, details of the other babies, the other women involved, the amount of money he had stolen via estimation, every disgusting line.
And when she lowered the letter, she lifted her chin, the tears falling freely and it was hard to say if they were of joy, anger, or sadness.... Nor the little sobs because Ruth did not usually carry on so. "He ne'er married me, ms. Not legal like, but I ain't the only one and my son has a full brood o' sisters maybe even a brother... And the only one he is married to... Is a woman named Sarah Monroe... He ain't married to me though. Oh, me poor son.... Stuck with him as a da for sure, the drunken sot, and without a last name. Me son is going to get hurt because of him not being legitimate, it's not fair Ma...." And then she started to sob for real when that part sunk in. "He is a good boy and doesn't deserve that." She then dropped the letter and started to weep for her child, showing just how much she loved Jacob.
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Lottie had been prepared to offer sage wisdom of motherhood, to pass down knowledge and experience to the next generation to use how they wished. Rather she remained silent, in an effort to soothe all the feelings that sudden bubbled up. The protective instincts of a thousand millennia were ignited in a flash of emotion. It was mostly rage at that fool and his tool. If she had where he was in the moment, she would have castrated him. Yet Lottie was also saddened and fearful for the road Ruth had now walk.
"Well, he's a feckin' bastard." She said a calm voice, "I hope he dies in a empty cot with sores on his lips and pus on his penis." She continued vulgarly, yet with same light, airey, tone she might use if genteel company came for tea.
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She wiped her face. Then she took a deep breath. "On one hand, it's good he ain't me husband... On the other, Jacob didn't ask to be born. Ye see what a sweet boy he is... I want him to be far different from Angus. I want him to grow up into a fine man... And now that it's out... Babies have lost their da who was never there ta begin with."
She sniffled and stood up to pace... She was so agitated that hugging her was definitely easily the wrong move. She then moved to the wall and started wailing on it. She didn't care that it hurt or that she was so enraged it gave her enough strength to damage the wall as well as her hand. She didn't stop until her knuckles bled.
"The children... They don't deserve what he did to us, the mothers. Because of one man, ma... Several young lasses like me were lied to and led ta believe it would be proper like... What a load of ballocks!" And then she hit the wall so hard that the pop of her bones could be heard.
The pain got through to her enough she cradled her hand and pressed herself back against that damaged wall. "I promise I'll fix it, ma...I'll pay for it..." She started to slide to her butt and then let herself cry ugly.
What he had done was unspeakable. She also worked to try and cradle the non dominant hand, she clearly had two broken digits but the pain wasn't the cause for her current agony.
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"Ruth!" Lottie exclaimed, the violent outburst so out of character for her. She knew Bill capable of such, and had seen it over the years; the boys too could be imagined to do similar, there was a Blacke streak of hot temper in the family, rarely shown but always present. Lottie jumped to her feet and headlong into mothering mode.
"I know I said I wanted a bigger kitchen, but that's mad," she said hurridly as she moved to splint her daughter's injured hand with a rag. "You might have to see Doctor Wells for this. I know yer angry; I know you want to cut off his knackers, paint them gold, and swap them for the Whitby lighthouse lamp as a warning to other scoundrels not to try the same tricks, but punching walls; how will that help Jacob?"
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"I know, I know, but... I don't think I've e'er felt as angry as I do now. How could a man be like that? How could he string hearts along on a strand like a pearl necklace?" Speaking of Pearl, she had come to peek in to see what the commotion was. Jacob was whining from the noise of the wall punching. She overheard Lottie speak of the doctor and said, "I would be happy to fetch the doctor, would you like for me to take Jacob with me so you can continue to talk?" Ruth gave a half nod and aighed. Pearl went to ready the boy for the short journey and would be gone within the next several minutes with the bubbly child still in her arms.
"I don't know what ta do now..." Marry, she thought sarcastically... and then the picture of Edward's face filled her mind and she was distracted for a moment. His face seemed to calm her, she seemed to relax. She said softly, "I just feel at a loss, ma..."
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Lottie pursed her lips shut to keep a singular answer in: I told ye so. She and Ruth had had an argument, here in this very room about that man. Lottie had looked behind her on the long road of life travelled to date and said that man was utterly no good. As Lottie remembered it, Ruth had angrily protested, saying that Ma was out of touch, heartless, and cruel - among other things.
But Lottie shouldn't be so hard on her own kin. Lottie knew as well as anyone the effect of sweet words on a young girl's mind, there had been another.. and of course William Blacke.
"I know dear, we'll sort something it out.."
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Not that she knew what her mother was thinking, but she had the same type of thought pass through her mind while Lottie had hers, and regret etched itself across the younger woman's face, even guilt. She held her hand to her chest, knowing automattically after having gone through many of Edward's books in the pursuit of learning what school had not taught her. However, she still needed to take accountability, so even though she had apologized before, she looked up at her mother and said very softly, "I am truly sorry, ma... for how foolish I was to ye."
Then she buried her face halfway in one hand, sighing and letting the tears fall in a calm manner now at this point as acceptance set in. She looked to her mother after a few minutes, then slowly moved to stand and said, "I am so sorry..." and then, knowing full well Lottie never turned hugs down from her children even though she was mad at times, she enclosed her arms around her mother if she wasn't stopped and rested her head on her shoulder to cry.
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No matter the age of her children, Lottie's breast was available to them to cry upon.
"It'll be alright, Dear. Everythin' y'll be alright." She answered as softly as she could.
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