"Please... Oh... Uh... Jacob?" It was then that she realized he had been removed from the situation so he wouldn't have to see his mother in distress, the poor little boy. "I am sure he is fine... Betsy and Eleanor are good friends ta me." She relaxed, stood carefully, and took his arm. She still looked pale and tired, but a bit of fresh air would do her just fine. As they began to move toward the garden, she lapsed into silence, which probably suited him just fine. If they passed others by at all, she didn't seem to notice at all. Her face was pinched with some residual stress.

Even as they walked out into the cool air, she seemed to be preoccupied with the turmoil for the moment.

"Ah, yes, they are looking after him present," Edward confirmed when she deduced the location of the child without his help. They'd distracted the small boy who had been fussing quite a bit with his mother being in such sorts. They reached the gardens and walked around them slowly. Angus did excellent work and they were actually quite expansive. With sections devoted to vegetables, herbs, spices, and flowers. As they reached the latter section Edward paused when they found some daisies growing in the Earth, the man starred down at them his expression growing distant.

She noticed his expression, and she gave pause for a moment. Then she rounded on him and, without really thinking, moved to touch his face, gently pushing in hopes of turning his head or meeting his gaze. When she thought she had his attention, she gazed at his eyes, hoping he would look at her. "Edward, I... I am here." Her words were soft. "Whatever yer heart hurts from, whatever ye think I cannot handle, I am here. Ye have been ever my friend, and I am yers. I..." she stopped herself from declaring her love, but he might not have missed it in her dark eyes, ever earnest. She let the thought drift away because she was not allowed to love him.

The familiar contact of her hand against his cheek did attract his attention and he turned to Ruth. He blinked slightly and then shook his head and said with a sigh. "I'm sorry, just... lost in memory. My wife was quite fond of daisies." He offered her a wane smile as he reached out and patted her gently on the shoulder. "I'm glad you consider me a friend, I'd hate to think you'd see me as a burden, entirely possible considering how I've been these last few months." He'd gotten better, less withdrawn and more attentive but he was still scattered and melancholic.

"They are beautiful, sir," she said almost weakly. And she sighed softly, "Mayhap it ain't a good time ta be out here then. I did not wish ta make ye feel sad in a roundabout way." Then she turned her face so it was in profile and he might catch a glimpse of the faint dotting of freckles upon her fair cheeks. She wouldn't have noticed if he did look, for now she was the one who gazed off... But then she shook her head and her eyes went downcast. "Mayhap I should..." she paused, swallowing painfully. But if she left, wouldn't he starve? Oh, damn. This was a mistake.

He would never requite, she thought, and he would always be in pain if he couldn't climb back down to earth to the people who were frightened for him. She looked at him and England did as England does. The sound of thunder came from overhead. She looked at him one more time and then she turned and just... walked at first. She was sure he wouldn't follow.

She hoped for once that he didn't...

The first, cold, fat raindrop hit her neck and slithered down her spine. She began to half heartedly jog, then stumbled a few faster steps forward. She was soon lifting her skirts and running away from the estate, her chest heaving, her eyes burning with tears. A sob wrenched from her as soon as she knew he would have been far behind her. Assuming there was a pathway leading away from the garden into the countryside, she would dart away from him and his house and her feelings for him. She stumbled and fell, hitting the ground. The air whooshed out of her but she was alright. She buried her face in her arms as the rain started to slowly drizzle in a rhythm of offbeats.

She could see that she had done what she ought to have never done... And she would have to talk to Edward's brother. He would certainly understand, right? And she lay there, not moving, not crying, just resting her head against her arms and ignoring the dampness soaking into her clothes. She did not care right then, she felt like she wanted to melt into the ground.

"No, no it is quite alright Ruth."

Edward reassured her when she apologized for bringing him out into the gardens. But she didn't seem to notice as her gaze grew distant. Then, before he could say anything there was a peel of thunder and rain began to fall.

"Oh dear, we should get inside."

The man said as he cast his gaze upward only to find her stumbling away from the house. That wasn't good, a perplexed Edward went off after her. When she approached the treeline and fell to the ground he caught up only a few moments later.

"Ruth! You went the wrong way!"

Which, he wasn't quite sure how she'd made the mistake but as he got closer and noticed the state she was in he paused. She seemed over distraught and he crouched down next to her awkwardly putting a hand on her shoulder.

"Er, are you quite alright? What happened?"

They desperately needed to get back inside since neither of them could afford to catch a cold, but she didn't seem to be keen on it at the moment.

He'd followed her the one time she hoped he wouldn't. She closed her eyes and lifted her face toward the rain as if that would bring her to her proper senses. Ruth's eyes shifted to his face, a face memorized and etched into her mind. She looked tortured. "I don't think I can be here anymore, sir," she said in a strangled voice. "Because... I..." she met his gaze, "I feel things for ye I ought not to. Tis better I go before I make a fool of us both." She shuddered, "It's for ye I feel so strongly, not another. I've admired ye for months now and it tortures me so. Because this is not allowed. I'm not supposed to want a man above me own station, it's not proper, let alone me employer. I've been warned and scolded, and I promised me mother I would sooner die than bring more shame upon me family fer the way I feel. And I am married. I married a man who clearly loves himself and no other. And I'll be divorcin' him, and that will be scandalous too. All I do is cause scandal fer me feelins." There, it was now clear as to why she was so... overwrought.

"In any case, mayhap this is the sign I need ta be able to let ye go." And then she gave a humorless laugh and buried her face against her arms again. "Mayhap," her words were now muffled by the wet fabric of her gown, "I should tell the other Mister Blackwood I need ta seek employment elsewhere." But the thought of Jacob losing the only man who seemed worthy to be his father figure, well, that hurt too. "Ye deserve much better than the likes of me."

"Ah."

Edward said awkwardly as she revealed the troubles that currently plagued her. Something he hadn't expected or suspected, which left him rather stumped on how to react to the information that his maid had developed feelings for him. Not that it bothered him all that much, his family was of the nouveau riche and his late wife had been the daughter of a professor. Which, admittedly, meant she was better educated but still below Edward's own perceived station in life. Considering he wasn't the oldest brother, it wasn't like he was inheriting any of the family concerns. Not that anyone would have entrusted him with such things even if he'd been the elder.

"Well, I don't know if that is something worth quitting your job over. I am certainly not offended by your revelation, mostly baffled. I am, what? A decade your senior and a widower, I would think a young lady such as yourself would prefer someone a little less weathered. I should think any man would be lucky to catch your eye, so I can't imagine why you think I should deserve better. Especially knowing my history, I should think you deserve better than a man carrying my sins."

The man patted her shoulder as he said that. He was, fairly, certain that wasn't what she would want to hear but he was endeavouring to do his best. Ruth's state of clear distress made the kindly man feel quite a bit of it himself.

"Now, honestly, I think it best we get back inside and perhaps have a cup of tea to fortify our constitution. If needs be, we can chat about this further once we are out of the cold and wet, which will surely do neither of our health well if we continue to linger."

She didn't quite know what to say to his reply. She slowly peeled her face away from her wet sleeve, rain dripping freely down her face, eyes looking pretty hurt. She looked toward the house for a moment, and then looked at him. "I don't care about yer age, I care about the fact that ye light up when ye see something scientific happening. I care about the fact that I want ta be a better person because of ye, that me son adores ye, that everyone around ye sees ye wakin' from slumber and their faces light up knowin' ye talk to someone. I care that ye hurt, I've sat with ye for these months and have seen fer meself the passion ye have for yer craft. I care that yer face has been memorized from chin to hairline me eyes, and that I think constantly o' ye and the way ye treat me like I matter. I care that ye stood up to me wretch o' a husband without me askin' ye to. Ye've made such a mark upon me that ye just aren't e'en aware the impact, nor the importance of yer actions in the grand scheme o' things."

She paused, "And I care how ye feel, I constantly wonder how ye are when I am not around ye and I'm pretty sure the others have caught me mooning many a time. They might not know it is ye I've been pining for, but I've been pining." She looked down and sighed, "I care that yer name is like musical notes upon me tongue, that e'ery time I look at ye I wonder if ye could e'er love me the way that.........." she caught herself before she could repeat the word, for that word clearly frightened her after her dealings with Angus.

She shook her head and said, "I care that if I don't leave, I'll just do somethin' stupid like kiss ye." And then she started off toward the house, heedless of him keeping up with her pace, for it was brisk at this point.

Well, that was certainly quite a lot for Edward to take in. It appeared as though she was quite enamoured of him which left him quite befuddled since the thought of romance had never crossed his mind, quite simply, he had been certain that he didn't deserve another chance at love considering how his first marriage had ended. Now he had Ruth informing him that his opinion on the matter was not shared by at least one person and he was tempted to correct her on her own feelings. But before he could think of what to say she was getting up and heading back toward the house.

That, at least, was good and he moved to join her. Thankfully, the benefit of some motion gave him time to actually digest some of his thoughts and he decided that he should not, in fact, try to explain to her that she couldn't feel as she currently did. That was not how emotions worked, he was aware of that much. This left him with the question of what he should do since he didn't want Ruth to leave the manor over a crush. But he was not sure was quite fair to the young woman since he had no idea if he would or could accept her feelings. He was quite fond of young Jacob and would hate to not have the boy around to dote on, but he wasn't sure that was sufficient reason so wed the lad's mother by itself. He felt very put upon and decided that his idea for a cup of tea was precisely what was in order.