Quote:Dearest Pony,


Life has never felt so wonderful to me. Lorn has been so very considerate and loving, I hardly dare to breathe. The way he is with the children he took to his own heart, my babies are secure now and the voyage has been lovely and leisurely. London isn't someplace I like to be, but we're about to leave from here to get to the states. I feel as though the world has opened back up to me, and the colors of mourning could finally be laid to rest for now. I will always love Harold but he wouldn't have wanted me to live in sadness over him.

I never told you this but I watched him die before he died. I watched him take on the sadness of losing someone he treated. He was a good man but he took on too much of the world and it ended him. I don't think I could ever be with a doctor again. I would not want to watch them wither like Harold.

Lorn will never make me forget him, he knows I feel much for my late husband. He also knows about the clockmaker and how unlucky I have been with my own heart. I wish I could have gotten you to understand the loneliness I felt as a widow, the darkness that lay on my heart. I made mistakes but marrying Lorn is not one of them, as he makes me feel alive again.

I am so very sorry for hurting you, but you have to let me live my life or I will never learn to be happy again. And I am sure you will understand one day when the right person comes along and shows you how to live again. I want so much for you just to be happy.

Much love, always...
Karen