She looked at him, her brows puckering a little. She sighed and nodded, "I'm as alright as I can be, given the situation. I just feel so... stupid fer lettin' meself love the man the way that I did. I thought he loved me, but ye don't walk out on someone ye love and not look back until after it's too late. If he loved me like he said, loved Jacob even... Then why did he send me such an awful letter?" She snorted.

"I'm tired..." she went on to say.

"Hrmmm, well, I've certainly not spent a great deal of time studying the human mind as some people have. But I would guess that your ex-husband does whatever he thinks is most beneficial for himself at the time. So, at present, he thinks that getting you back would provide him some sort of advantage. He wanted naught but sex at first and was willing to do what it took to get it, then you were pregnant and he didn't want to deal with the responsibility so he left. If I had to guess at his current motivations, well, perhaps he wishes to leech off you now that you have stable employment? Either way, he's already proven he will do whatever he wishes regardless of the impact to yourself."

Edward said thoughtfully as he examined what she'd told him and dredge his memories for details. Honestly, he was surprised at how many he recalled. A lot of his memories of the last year were muddled but his conversations with Ruth stood out more clearly than many.

"Well, even if I have ta deal with him like this, mayhap it's worth it fer the good that came out of it. Jacob... and bein' here..." the with ye was left unsaid. It floated in the air silently between them, spoken clearly with her eyes if he only noticed. The way she traced the outline of his strongly chiseled jaw toward his distinctly shaped eyes and lips... well... every part of his face was like a map for her gaze to explore. She wondered what would happen if she emboldened herself just a little to give him a soft, chaste kiss... her belly clenched in a way it had never done so with Angus.

She had to look away, look at something else... Her gaze dropped to the top of Jacob's head and she buried her lips into his hair, inhaling the clean scent of the locks that tickled at her nostrils. "I am sure everythin' will be fine soon enough," she said thickly.

Edward caught the look Ruth was giving him and he paused for a moment, their eyes meeting before she turned her gaze away. He wasn't sure what emotion he'd seen there but he thought it was likely best not to ask given the subject matter.

"Indeed, there is no need to worry. As I've said before, you have the full protection that the Blackwood family can offer when dealing with your ex-husband. I'll not have anyone underneath this roof feel as though they are not safe."

It was clear that he felt quite sincerely about that particular statement, it shone through in his expression.

"Thank you," she murmured and then moved finally to put Jacob in his usual spot with a rattle she had gotten while at the market. She was able to provide a good life for him despite the circumstances of his birth. The baby babbled cheerfully on the blanket she put under him. The chubby fellow gummed on the toy as Ruth moved to sit back down and actually get some food in her. Except, despite how delicious it was, it was hard for her to eat.

She was silent for a long time, which was unusual for her around him in particular. In the time that they had spent with each other over the last several months in particular, she was able to be herself around Edward without him thinking of her as being beneath him. She might not have the most refined speech, but she had proven to be rather smart. She could follow along with his equations even. There was also the fact that it was easy to be comfortable around the man as he was starting to pay more attention to her words when he was able to.

She finally looked up at him, her eyes somewhat shadowed, "I am thankful fer all o' ye who took me in. Everybody has become family to me."

"Think nothing of it. It is the right thing to do."

Edward said as his gaze drifted to Jacob as the boy played with his rattle. A small smile on Edward's face as he observed. For all his sorrow had made him a bit hard to talk with a good heart didn't vanish with grief even if it was sometimes shadowed by it. A shadow which crossed his face once more as she said the word family. The man's expression grew haunted and he trembled.

"Er, yes, I am... glad you feel that way. I suppose we are a bit of a family in this manor."

He reached up and rubbed at his eyes lightly letting out a low shuddering breath.

"We keep our own... safe."

Without a word, he pushed to his feet wavering unsteadily as he mumbled.

"Sorry, I am suddenly feeling quite poorly I think I need to lie down."

He tottered toward the door then and almost strumbled in his haste due to how off-balance he felt.

"Wait," she said and stood, "Let me help ye. Ye look unsteady," she moved to him and assuming he didn't stop her, she'd tuck herself under one of his arms and do this in a steadying way. She would not ask him why he trembled, she would not pry, but she would help support him somehow. She did not look up at his face as she attempted to guide him to the spot where he was usually spotted when asleep. Once she knew he was safely laying upon the couch, she would get Jacob and leave Edward to calm himself. The scent of her soap, nothing fancy or flowery, would probably drift toward his nostrils as they moved across the room at a pace he could handle.

"Oh, uh, yes fine thank you."

Edward said not sure what had come over him. Or rather, he was aware of what had come over him but he wasn't sure what to do about it. Family had become something of a loaded term for him and looking the Ruth and the young Jacon while talking of protecting them had... The memories were too much. He shuddered lightly as she helped him onto the familiar couch as he closed his eyes and took a breath. The scent of clean soap reached his nostrils and he found it somewhat soothing as he tried to calm the raging horrors that currently claimed his mind.

She was about to get up and walk away as she normally would under such a circumstance but seeing him in the state he was in caused her to give pause. Ruth knelt down by the couch, brow knit with genuine worry and care. She swallowed heavily and tentatively touched his arm, "Edw--- Mister Blackwood..." she said softly, "I am here..." And that was all she said because anything else would have been too much, perhaps, and those three words were probably profound enough. Especially, she thought, given the fact that maybe that's all he needed to hear from anybody.

Her feelings for him were such that if she left in that moment, she would regret it.

"I... thank you Ruth but they aren't. They never will be and it is all my fault."

As he said the words streams started to stream from the corners of his eyes. He'd never talked about it before, not with her, not with anyone. He'd known that they'd all speculated what it was that haunted him, most knew that he'd lost his family and guessed he blamed himself. But he'd never actually shared that aloud because he didn't want to burden anyone else with the truth.

"I started the fire, it was an accident. I never should have been doing such dangerous experiments inside the house. That they died and I survived when I was in the same room the fire started? This has to be god's punishment."

That was what he'd truly believed. It wasn't right that he'd somehow managed to get himself outside of the house in a daze while his wife and unborn child were left to burn. It could only be god ensuring he had time to properly understand the gravity of his sin before he burned in the fires of perdition. He could see it now, burning eternally in the same fire that had taken his family from him. It was what he deserved.