Constable
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Elijah looked at him shocked and confused. "What? When? I do not know when this could have happened. Perhaps I misunderstood. Please, tell me. I really do care and I want to know. It might be hard to believe me, but I am trying, Anthony. I try to listen to you and I am trying to help and do anything I can to make you happy but I fail. And you just become quiet and don't tell me how I failed." It was frustrating and he had to admit the bad was overcoming the good.
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bastard
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Anthony really did want to believe that Elijah genuinely cared, but it was hard. He looked away from him again, tears beginning to swell up in his eyes just from the sheer frustration and everything. He considered for a brief moment whether this was worth getting this mad over, and came to the conclusion that, yes, it absolutely was.
"Like– like when I told you that I want to kill myself. I– I tell you something like that, and you just basically go 'well, maybe you should be happy and glad about your life, instead'." Maybe the anger was making him misremember things, but he was absolutely certain that's how it went. "And, just...." he didn't finish his sentence.
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Constable
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Could this man stop hurting him and shocking him? He stared at him, "That isn't what happened..' He couldn't remember the exact conversation but he would never be so cold. "You do not wish to see a doctor, and I do not want to force you into something that would only harm you. I want to help you find something worth living for. I am not a miracle man, so I do not know what I can do. If there is anything I can do to help you I am more than open to, but I am only a man. I do not have answers even though I wish I did."
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bastard
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Anthony was just...so angry, right now. He really didn't understand Elijah's logic, here, and wasn't even sure if he wanted to understand. How is he supposed to talk to him about things he's doing wrong, when whenever he actually does so, Elijah just keeps acting so defensive like this? Anthony buried his face in his hands, trying to find a response to all that. But by now he was crying too hard to be able to reply.
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Constable
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Age: 30
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Elijah clenched his fists and closed his eyes, taking a deep breath in a desperate attempt to settle his frustration. "I'm sorry, clearly there was a misunderstanding. I am sorry I am not trying to brush it aside. I do not want you to kill yourself and I am always here for you to talk to. I fail you, I get that. I don't want to and I hope you will be patient with me.. " He took a deep breath and slowly relaxed his hands.
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bastard
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Age: 29 (July 24 1865)
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Anthony rubbed his eyes. "And that's literally all you had to say," he said. Literally, almost everything that he wanted right now was just an actual, real apology. By no means did he immediately forgive him and forget everything that's happened, and by no means was he even happy, but he was at least somewhat glad Elijah said those words. He was still absolutely pissed and ready to jump at Elijah if he said something wrong again, but he was also tired and sad and not in the mood to argue like this anymore.
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Constable
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Age: 30
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Elijah stared down at the ground in defeat. So that was it? An apology and yet he wasn't any happier. No closer to an understanding, no explanation. Just that it seemed Elijah was the bad guy because he didn't say what he wanted to hear and there was no closer to an answer or a guide in the right direction. It felt like Anthony was constantly putting up walls with the rare window, but never a door to let him in. He wanted to say or ask a few things, but he was trying to not lose Anthony though moments like this hurt and he was certain the other didn't care. He slowly stood, "I am sorry...' He repeated, far more quiet than before. He turned away and walked towards the kitchen, "Are you hungry? Thirsty? If you are tired, I can make up the sofa so you can sleep in the bed." He didn't feel like it was right at this moment to even dare suggesting they share it. He was being punished and he only wanted to know why. Elijah cleared his throat and barely glanced in his direction, "thank you for coming back." The pain in his heart made him wonder if this was only a passing thing or if things would continue along this path. They'd had good times together but even on their first day it was difficult, could he persevere and bring back some semblance of joy?
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bastard
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Anthony took a deep, and a bit shaky, breath. He glanced at Elijah as the latter stood up and addressed him, again. "No," he shook his head, not wanting anything the man offered him, there. "I'm– I just....need a moment." To cool down a bit. Maybe once they've both calmed down a bit they can have.....an actually better talk? He wasn't very optimistic about that — it was just a foolish, naive idea he entertained. Perhaps he was just being incredibly cynical, but he genuinely could not envision their relationship surviving this.
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Constable
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Age: 30
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Elijah glanced over and nodded. "Take your time." He leaned his head against the wall in the other room and closed his eyes. He never knew being in a relationship could feel like such a struggle. He had to be optimistic though. Otherwise, what was the point in even trying if he believed it was going to end?
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bastard
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Age: 29 (July 24 1865)
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Anthony sighed. He tried not to think about the current situation too much, so that he can actually let himself calm down, but it wasn't easy. Really, he just wished that everything would magically become alright and that they wouldn't have any problems ever again, but he knew that was unrealistic and just an idle fantasy.
Anthony looked up at the ceiling in exasperation. It was tough to try and talk and communicate with Elijah about the relationship, but it was also bad for him to just pretend everything was fine. He seriously did not know what to do, right now.
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